


Do You Wish It Was Me

by shewasjustagirl



Category: Rhett & Link
Genre: M/M, Pining, Song Lyrics, Songfic, mature for feelings and a tiny bit of other stuff, pre-wedding
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-04
Updated: 2018-02-04
Packaged: 2018-12-11 05:29:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11707773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shewasjustagirl/pseuds/shewasjustagirl
Summary: The night before Link's wedding, Rhett unintentionally admits his feelings for his friend.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Ever since I first heard Do You Wish It Was Me by Jason Aldean several months ago, I've had all kinds of rhinky feels about it. I highly suggest listening to it now or when it comes up in the story. <3

Four friends gathered in Sue Neal’s home one final time. Whether or not they fully took it in, they all knew it was the last time they would be there together, just the four of them. After all, one of them was getting married the next day, the first of them to take the plunge, and two others had recently gotten engaged. 

This was both a celebration and a goodbye. 

They laughed and told stories around the dinner table, many at Link’s expense. Sue served them dinner and chuckled at their jokes. When they broke open a twelve-pack of beers, she told them to behave, grabbed a small overnight bag, and reminded Link about the banana pudding in the refrigerator. Then she kissed his forehead and left the house for the hotel room she’d rented for the night, the slamming screen door escorting in the sounds of the night as she left. 

When they’d finished eating, Link doled out the pudding and the guys moved to the living room, Tim and Gregg fighting over who would get the couch that night and who would sleep on the pallet of thick blankets and quilts Sue had made up on the floor. They had all agreed not to sleep in her bed. She was doing enough by giving them a final night alone. 

Rhett would sleep on the guest bed. That was decided quickly and without any conversation. The other two young men knew this had been Rhett’s second home as a child. That it still felt like home to him. They simply set their things down in the main room and began arguing about which of them would take the floor. 

The four of them sat around telling stories for hours, telling off on one another and joking about all the girls Link hadn’t been with. How whipped he’d been once he met Christy.

After they’d each had a couple of beers, Rhett brought out his guitar, and the four of them sang together, Rhett and Link harmonizing to the songs of their childhood and Tim and Gregg doing their best to chime in. 

Eventually Gregg announced that they were all sitting in his room, and that, anyway, if Link didn’t go to bed he’d be tired and grumpy and might not be able to get it up, literally or figuratively, the next evening. 

Link grinned and thanked them for coming, his cheeks warm from smiling and from the two beers. He shook Tim’s hand, then Gregg’s, then Rhett’s, before pulling Rhett in for a quick hug and a sincere “Thanks for everything, brother.” 

Then he shuffled off to sleep for the final time as a single man in the room that had been his for most of his childhood. 

Tim took his spot on the floor -- Gregg reasoned that he, because he was in the wedding, should get the better night’s rest -- and Rhett grabbed his guitar. He didn’t have to say much as he moved toward the patio door and out into the warm late-Spring night. His friends could see it on his face. He was wired, nervous, and at least a little sad that his and Link’s carefree days were all but officially over. 

For nearly two hours, Rhett played, occasionally humming along as he perched himself on a deck chair in the Neals’ backyard. Lightning bugs floated around him, and he strummed aimlessly at his guitar, picking out a few songs he knew. From time to time he’d set his guitar down, heedless to the dew in the grass around him, and consider sleeping out in the yard, the sounds of the Southern night just the lullaby he needed. 

But he kept playing, humming more frequently, singing quietly, until he found himself going through entire songs, sometimes making up his own words and chords.

Link awoke, the alarm clock on his bedside table reading 1:50 a.m., to the sound of music. He reached for the clock, his still-sleeping mind assuming it had been set incorrectly and that someone else would get him up in the morning, but his palm coming down on its power button did nothing to stop the twangy guitar.

 

He nearly made it back to sleep, but the familiar voice cut through his consciousness. It was softer than normal, putting on a performance without seeking an audience. Rhett’s voice was passionate but hollow, filtering in from the yard through Link’s first-floor window. 

Link moved to call for Rhett, tell him to be quiet and get to bed, but that voice stopped him. Carefully, he made his way to the window and cracked it an inch, murmuring a prayer of gratitude when it slid open without a sound.

The tune was unfamiliar to him, and the voice singing it, had it not belonged to his friend of fifteen years, would have been, too. The performance pulled at his heart, dragged on him. The clear, deep voice was almost a moan. It was pained. No nerves or insomnia could be blamed for the sound coming from Rhett’s chest. It was beautiful, but Link knew he would never forget how much it hurt.

Link stumbled outside without pulling on more than a pair of pajama bottoms, careful to step far clear of the snoring Tim in the living room. Outside, past the patio and around the side of the house, he saw Rhett, who sat in a deck chair facing away from the house. Before Link could speak, Rhett began humming another song, and Link’s heart plummeted when the words came.

_When the sun slowly chases the moon from the sky_  
_And touches your face as you open your eyes_  
_What are you thinking? Do you like what you see?_  
_Is it all that you dreamed of, or do you wish it was me?_

It’s insomnia, Link told himself. Don’t be crazy. Just nerves and insomnia and two or three beers.

_I know that you did what you thought you should do_  
_It was safe and secure, so completely thought through_  
_But you sacrificed passion and abandoned your dreams_  
_Baby, was it all worth it, or do you wish it was me?_

Shit.

Link lifted his hand, his mouth moving, but he couldn’t prevent himself from hearing the final verse.

_Is the life that you've chosen free from regret?_  
_Or is what might have been just too hard to forget?_  
_Do the memories haunt you? Do they beg and they plead?_  
_Are you satisfied, baby, or do you --?_

“Rhett,” Link finally broke in. “I don’t want to scare you, but I’m out here.”

If it weren’t for the moonlight, Link wouldn’t have seen Rhett jump, his shoulders tightening as he turned halfway around in his chair, his furrowed brow and the wetness in his eyes nearly concealing his shock. His hand darted up to his face, wiping quickly at his eyes. He cleared his throat. “I, uh, did I wake you up?” 

“Yeah, ya did, bo.” Link’s hand was suddenly on Rhett’s shoulder, and he gave it a quick squeeze. “C’mon.”

Link hesitated. He considered asking if Rhett needed to talk. It seemed clear that he did. Instead, Link took his hand and pulled until Rhett stood. The taller man held onto the guitar, and the pair moved back toward the patio. As Link eased open the door to the house, he pointed toward Tim and Gregg, gesturing for Rhett to avoid them as the two men were plunged back into darkness inside the house. 

Once inside, Link tugged Rhett down the hall toward the guest bedroom, opening the door with a creak and dragging his friend across the threshold. Carefully, turning the knob to prevent it from clicking into place, Link shut the door behind them. 

Rhett set the guitar down in the corner and turned around to find Link waiting at the foot of the bed. Link sighed heavily as Rhett turned away again, taking off his shirt and replacing it with a softer one, taking off his jeans and dressing in the not-quite-long-enough cotton pants he slept in when he wasn’t home.

“I’ll go to bed,” Rhett whispered, just a breath, before turning around to find Link’s eyes on him. 

“We could talk if you’re not ready to sleep,” Link offered. He was waiting for Rhett to ask the question, and he busied himself with dragging his body up across the bed to the headboard, realizing for the first time that he’d carried in the midnight dew on the hem of his pajamas. He waited a beat longer, rolling up the pants to a cuff just under his knee, before he looked up at Rhett again. 

“How long were you out there?” 

There it was. 

“A while, I think. Where did that song come from?” Link countered, knowing his answer hadn’t been very revealing. He may not have heard the whole song, and he couldn’t be sure how much he cut off, but he’d certainly heard plenty. 

The house was quiet enough that Link could hear Rhett’s mouth part into a half smile. “Just something I’ve been working on. Ad-libbed it a little bit in there. I guess you’re not gonna let me perform it at the wedding, huh?”

For a moment, Link considered leaving it at that. He and Rhett had ended fights with jokes many times. But this wasn’t a fight. Not between them, anyway. And leaving Rhett alone with his delicate chuckle would be anything but a delicate handling of the situation. 

Link pressed his lips together and turned them up momentarily, giving a little shrug. Then he patted the spot next to him on the full bed. They were both thin, but with Rhett’s height and Link’s deceptively long limbs, they fit better when they were sitting up against the headboard. But now, their comfort with one another, which Link had never questioned until about twenty minutes ago, faltered, and as Rhett lowered himself, Link sat up taller, ensuring there would be space between them.

“Just go, man, it’s two in the morning.” 

Link moved his head from side to side a couple times without any force behind the motion. He was willing to leave if Rhett made him, but he was convinced he should stay. Rhett stared into him, moonlight glinting off the excess moisture in his big grey eyes. 

Link stared back, unflinching. “Do you want to talk? I feel like...now is the time.”

“Two in the morning?” Rhett shot back, knowing that wasn’t what Link meant. 

They sat in silence for a long moment before Rhett sighed deeply. The bed grunted weakly under him as he slid down the headboard and rested his shoulders atop the pillow and sham that remained there. He rubbed at his forehead, his eyes closed. “We can just go on with our lives, Link. Nothing to talk about.”

“Do you want to try and answer some of the questions you asked in that song? Or want me to?”

Rhett lay still. Both men were certain their pounding hearts could be heard by everyone in the house. Rhett knew what would happen if he gave honest answers to those questions. And when he wrote them, he never meant for Link to know he’d even thought about them.

“Do I wish…” Link trailed off, the thought hanging between them. The central air kicked on, startling both men with the sound, but the cool gust coming from the room’s one vent did nothing to relieve the pressure of the heavy question. 

Link lifted a hand, testing his motor skills, and, satisfied with the result, reached down to his friend. With a few necessary adjustments, he got his arms around Rhett, the taller man allowing his head to sink into Link’s chest. 

“You think I’m making a mistake?” 

Rhett shrugged his shoulders. Link hummed the tune Rhett had been playing, doing his best to remember how the song had phrased it. Finally he whispered, “What might have been.” Link waited just a heartbeat, and finished, “With you?”

Rhett gasped in a heavy breath and Link could feel him shaking, the bed under them moving with him. Link slid his body down into the pillows, the comforter sliding down and the fabric pulling at itself under Rhett’s weight as he did. “Shh,” Link tried, but the tears rolled freely down his friend’s face, wetting the pillow where both of their heads now rested. 

“Rhett…you never,” Link grazed his thumbs across Rhett’s cheeks as he caught his eyes again. Embarrassment and betrayal and hurt and then, finally, _hope_ flashed in them, and Rhett pressed his palm to Link’s chest. 

“What was I supposed to say?”

“You could have asked sooner if the memories haunt me. If I regret doing the safe thing.”

Rhett moved his hand up from Link’s chest to his mouth. “Don’t, please. Don’t do me like that.” Rhett closed his eyes as the tears forced their way out of him again. Rhett had prepared himself to deal with standing beside Link at his wedding. He would patch over his heart. Figure something out. Make his own safe choice. But Link mocking him, after hearing the music that had grown out of his pain, was more than he could bear.

Under Rhett’s hand, Link’s lips came together, pressing up into the calloused fingertips that quieted them. Rhett blinked several times in succession, clearing the fog from his vision. The air conditioner shivered into silence with a final clank, and both men drew in sharp breaths at the stillness that swallowed them again.

Gently, with a final kiss in its palm, Link set Rhett’s hand down on the bed between them. He returned his fingers to Rhett’s face, brushing away the wet trails left by falling tears, and pressed his lips into one warm, red cheek.

Rhett breathed through his mouth, taking in his surroundings the way a vacuum cleaner does, sucking in as much of the air around him as he could get into his tightly clenched lungs.

Wide, soft lips made their way around his face and across the patch of beard on his chin, landing on his nose before settling directly above Rhett’s mouth. Link’s heart raced against Rhett’s arm as he whispered, “Do _you_ wish it were us?”

Rhett leaned forward, a stretch of his neck the only movement necessary to throw himself into Link’s kiss. He knew there was no need to answer the question. By writing it, he already had. 

 

The morning sun streaming in the window woke Link, his eyes blinking open, and he smiled, one arm wrapped tightly around the long, thin torso of the man whose bed he shared. It took a moment for him to realize that Rhett, his legs tangled in the sheets and intertwined with Link’s limbs, was already awake and looking at him. 

“What’re you thinkin’?” Rhett asked, a reluctant smile remaining on his face as he pushed Link’s hair up off his forehead, the sun streaking across his dark locks.

Link grinned. He didn’t know how to answer. He was never good at spontaneous declarations. Not at getting them right, anyway. He considered kidding about the headlines -- Groom Runs Away with Groomsman -- but that wasn’t a joke, or it wouldn’t be. And even if it were, it wasn’t terribly funny. 

Instead, he reached for Rhett’s free hand, forcing his fingers between Rhett’s, kicking his legs free of the sheets, and he pressed his lips to Rhett’s for the first time in the light. He moved one knee up and across Rhett’s waist, straddling him and pressing his bare chest to the one he’d freed from its shirt before fading into sleep just hours before. 

Rhett chuckled quietly and slid his arms around Link’s back. Link moved his hands along Rhett's sides and kissed at his neck. 

“Hey dude, wake up!” Gregg called through the door. 

Link froze. 

“You up man? We gotta go find Link. He’s not in his room.”

_Shit._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Do You Wish It Was Me was written several years after this story for Jason Aldean, but I can't help hearing Rhett in it.
> 
> I'd love any feedback! Your comments and kudos would be very much appreciated! <3
> 
> And come find me on Tumblr as [clemwasjustagirl](http://clemwasjustagirl.tumblr.com/) if you're into that kind of thing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Rhett and Link emerge from the guest bedroom, they have to form a plan for the rest of the day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to [mythicalseries](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mythicalseries/pseuds/Mythicalseries/), [linkslipssinkships](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LinksLipsSinkShips/pseuds/LinksLipsSinkShips/), and everyone else who encouraged me to keep writing this story.

Rhett could see it all play out in his mind. It was a moment, a conversation, a screaming match about which he’d had many nightmares. Gregg would walk in, see the way Link was perched across his hips, his bare back contrasting with the tangled sheets. He’d see Rhett’s shirt on the floor and the truth in his eyes. That’s when all hell would break loose.

Link’s hands darted up to cover Rhett’s mouth, and two big grey eyes bugged out in terror above them. Hastily, Link whispered, “Do you? Wish it were us?” Rhett’s head moved in a shaky nod, a question in his eyes. “Okay then. Trust me.”

When Link began to speak, Rhett tried to cry out, shaking his head, but Link’s hands silenced him, and then it was too late. 

“I'm in here, you dummy!” Link called out, and Gregg opened the door as Link moved his hands from Rhett’s face to his shoulders, pressing them down into the bed.

“Dude, wrestling? Seriously? Are you two ever gonna grow up?” Gregg laughed and called out for Tim. “I found him, bro. He’s in here with Rhett. Not a case of cold feet.”

Rhett sucked in a breath, and his eyes darted to meet Link’s. 

“Shh,” Link ordered, pushing down on Rhett’s chest one final time as he flipped himself over onto the other side of the bed.

Tim turned the corner, heavy bags under his eyes and slow footsteps indicating that he hadn’t slept much and that he wasn’t too worried about Link really having run away. He plodded down the hall into the doorway of the guest room as Link stood from the bed. “Dude you two both slept in here and I had to be on the floor?”

“Old habits die hard, buddy,” Link laughed. “Y’all ready for some breakfast? I think Rhett and I will go get something.”

Rhett sat up in the bed, staring at the other three young men as they talked about breakfast. They batted around the idea of making some eggs that were surely in the refrigerator, but Link insisted that he and Rhett would pick something up and bring it back. After a few minutes, Tim and Gregg disappeared from the room, Tim intent on claiming Link’s bed and sleeping a little longer.

“Put some clothes on man, don’t just sit there,” Link said, poking his head back into the doorway with a grin. When Rhett only stared back, he whispered, “Rhett. Brother. Get moving.”

Rhett stared forward, stunned, his eyes glazed over, as one thought overtook his mind: _We just got away with that._

“Rhett,” Link whispered, taking a few steps into the room and shaking his shoulder. “I need you to stop freaking out. There’s gonna be a lot more of that to do later, and right now we need to get somewhere we can talk.”

Rhett shook his head, the fog finally lifting as Link stood over him. He grabbed a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, pulled on his sneakers without socks, and before he knew it, he was driving Link to get donuts.

Saturday mornings were busy for the donut shop parking lot. Rhett guessed a quarter of the families in Fuquay would have something from the shop for breakfast that morning, so he pulled in next door in the lot of an abandoned fast food place. As he put the car in park, he took a deep breath, steadying himself after the silent drive before he faced Link.

“You gonna talk to me?”

When Rhett turned, Link’s eyes were on him, a hint of concern in them even as he smiled softly. Rhett took another deep breath and reached for Link’s hand, finding strength there to finally speak. 

“Yes,” a wary smile finally made its way across Rhett’s features. 

For half an hour they talked, each of them stealing a few quick kisses as they did. The words came pouring out, no longer hidden behind a wall of fear. Rhett admitted that he never expected Link to know how he felt. They’d both made plans that only involved them being friends. Best friends, yes. But not lovers. And it was complicated, Link explained. He loved Christy. He’d long ago hidden away his feelings for Rhett, and accessing them now, on this day in particular, was a little overwhelming.

“But I don’t...I don’t think I can get married today,” Link concluded, and Rhett’s lips were on him in the next breath. 

“Please. Please don’t.”

 

There was a lot to consider. Link was due at the church by four. Rhett was in charge of getting him there in one piece. Two sets of families were in town. Several very unhappy parents would have to be informed, and how would Link explain? And most importantly, in a few short hours, Christy and her bridesmaids would begin getting dressed. 

Link was adamant that he wouldn’t let her get that far. But that didn’t give him much time to solidify a plan.

By the time they arrived back at Sue’s home with a dozen donuts, they had the rough sketches of their day in place. Rhett would be in charge of breaking the news to Tim and Gregg as soon as Link left to meet Christy. Rhett could only do so much, but he would wait by the phone for Link’s call. If it were possible for him to head off the cake or the videographer, make calls to guests, anything like that, he would. 

Link assured Rhett that his role would make sense to everyone. As Link’s best friend, of course he would be tasked with helping Link make those difficult calls. Whatever it took, they had to shoulder the responsibility for stopping this wedding, and the sooner they got started, the better.

No one had to know why. No one had to be told that Link was calling off his wedding to pursue something, whatever this was, with Rhett. Everyone could be left to imagine their own reasons. Link got cold feet. Got scared. Had a previous marriage from a wild night in Vegas. It would give everyone something to talk about, anyway. 

And then, when they’d gotten through the hardest part, for the day at least, they’d meet at the Holiday Inn in Angier.

Rhett’s eyes went wide when Link suggested the hotel. 

“Rhett. We need a place to talk and figure everything out. My mom will be back tonight, so we can’t do that here. We’ll get a room with two beds. I mean, no pressure and, you know, if you’re worried about people...suspecting things.” 

As the car came to a halt in front of the Neal home, Link brushed his fingertips against Rhett’s cheek. “Today’s gonna be really hard, bo. Will you be there with me when it’s over?”

A broad smile broke across Rhett’s face, looking pointedly into Link’s eyes as he grabbed his hand once again. “Of course I will.” Link leaned in for a final kiss on Rhett’s cheek, and Rhett wrapped his arms around Link’s neck as he whispered in his ear. “Thank you. Thank you thankyouthankyou.”

Link smiled slowly as he broke away, searching Rhett’s eyes one final time. “Okay, I have to go. Wish me luck.”

 

As Link got in his truck and drove away, Rhett walked in the front door with eleven donuts, a forcibly relaxed gait, and every one of his nerves on fire. 

Telling Gregg and Tim that Link had gone to talk to Christy, and that he would be the one to let them know why, went as well as Rhett could have hoped. They seemed to accept that Link had come into the guest bedroom early that morning freaking out about the wedding. That Rhett had done his best to calm him. That Link couldn’t be talked down.

After they’d each eaten two donuts, it became clear that Rhett wasn’t giving up any more details about Link’s state of mind and that he wasn’t in the mood to joke about the potential outcomes of the day. Rationally, Rhett knew his friends were trying to lighten the mood, but he now had new fears about Link getting shot by Christy’s dad, Christy beating him to death with a white satin high heel, the bridesmaids ganging up on him…

Before long, Tim left, and Gregg followed closely behind him. As he reached for his bag he turned back toward Rhett. “Hey man. I brought that chair in out of the grass. Put it on the patio while Tim was back asleep. You uh, if you or Link need to...talk, let me know, okay?” Rhett nodded, his lips pressed hard together as his face went red, but Gregg continued, seemingly determined to get his thought out. “Or if y’all need a place to stay or whatever. Just. Keep me posted, all right?”

Rhett’s heart was racing as he shook Gregg’s hand, said goodbye, and promised they’d be in touch. He didn’t expect too many people would be kind to Link today, and he looked forward to telling him about the interaction.

After only a few minutes, Rhett paced in the kitchen, glancing occasionally at the phone, knowing Link hadn’t been gone long enough to be calling yet. He had to drive across town, convince Christy’s mom and maid of honor to let him speak with her, have the talk…

Rhett stilled his hands against the counter, pressing each finger individually into the faux wood laminate and stretching them wide, breathing deeply as he did. There was only one more person Rhett was solely in charge of informing about the wedding’s cancellation, and before he could lose his nerve, he dialled her well-rehearsed number and waited.

Jessie answered cheerily, and her voice grew higher pitched and faster when she heard Rhett’s hello. He stopped her in her line of excited questions, and it only took a few seconds for her voice to drop along with Rhett’s. 

“Oh, no.”

“Yeah. So I’m going to try to help Link make calls and stuff if I can, y’know?” Rhett muttered nervously. “Maybe then stay here again. I think.”

“Can I help? You’re still at his mom’s?”

“No, baby, don’t come today. I don’t know what all’s gonna happen.”

“And I’d be in the way?”

“I didn’t say that…” Rhett complained, cursing himself for how terribly he was handling this.

“Well, will you call me later?” They weren’t close friends, but Jessie and Christy were getting there, and Rhett could hear in her voice that she longed to be there for her. Or to help someone, Christy, Link, Rhett, any of them, get through this day.

“‘Course I will.”

Rhett set the phone back in its cradle and said a silent prayer that he hadn’t missed Link’s call during the thirty-minute conversation. 

 

An hour later, Rhett had taken a shower, gotten dressed again, and packed his and Link’s clothes into each of their duffel bags. He ate another donut, turned the television on and then thought better of it, and returned to pacing the kitchen. 

The phone hadn’t made a peep. For a few minutes, Rhett scared himself into believing that it wasn’t working, and he ran in circles around the house checking wires and ensuring that both the phone in the kitchen and the cordless one by the couch had a dial tone. Surely someone, Link or not, would have called Sue’s home phone on the morning of Link’s wedding. 

When he thought he might snap, Rhett remembered Link and his meticulous nature. And Rhett knew exactly where his friend had gotten it from. Sue must have alerted her extended family that she wouldn’t be reachable at home.

When Link had been gone for over four hours, Rhett began to fear the worst. It was still possible that Link would change his mind. And he knew his friends were joking earlier, but Rhett now considered that Link could have gotten into some kind of fight. Or a wreck. Link could be at the hospital right now, and Rhett would be far down the list of people anyone would think to contact.

Rhett sat on the edge of the couch, its cushion only just registering his weight as he rested there. The elbows on his knees were digging in, leaving behind red patches replicating the cross-hatching on his denim jeans.

He took to staring at the wall clock, its motion almost hypnotic as Rhett attempted to settle his racing heart and mind. At nearly two o’clock, as the minute hand’s methodic journey neared the next hour mark, Rhett was startled out of his stupor by the ringing phone.

He jumped toward the end of the couch, nearly knocking over the end table as he answered the cordless phone. Link’s voice came through from the other side, and Rhett’s heart soared.

“Oh thank God, Link, where are you? What can I do? How did it go? Are you okay?”

“Rhett, I’m at the church.” 

“Oh.” Rhett’s heart sank back into his chest as the image of Link standing at an altar, committing himself to a life with someone else, flashed across his vision. “Okay. Should I...”

“Stop that. It’s not what you think.” Link’s voice was even but quiet. He couldn't be speaking at more than a soft murmur into the other end of the line. “But we’ve gotta change our plans. I need you to come pick me up.”

“Sure, yeah. Are you okay?”

“Yes, but I can’t talk long. I’ll meet you on the parking lot side.”

“I’ll be there as soon as I can,” Rhett promised, already moving toward the back of the house to grab the two duffel bags. “Probably a half hour.”

“Be careful, okay? But...the faster you can get here the better.”

Rhett hastily placed the phone on its holder as he passed back through the living room, two bags slung over his shoulder. After grabbing his keys and, on a second glance, the box of donuts from the kitchen counter, he was out the door. He hesitated when he realized he couldn’t lock up the house, but Link’s words spurred him to leave it and hope for the best. 

Speed traps made it impossible to move as quickly as Rhett hoped to on the narrow highway between Buies Creek and Fuquay, but he knew where to find them, and he pressed the car to go as quickly as he dared. After a few minutes, he slammed his hand down on the radio, dropping the car into silence, but for the whirring of tires against asphalt.

Even without the music, his thoughts were too crowded. Link hadn’t said much, but Rhett began to fill in guesses about the events of the last several hours. 

For the first time, Link’s words really hit him. Link started out at Christy’s house and ended up at the church. 

Now Rhett was helping him run from there. 

Link was risking everything for Rhett. The scorn of his pastor, church, and family. The woman that he’d told Rhett only hours before he was in love with. The expectations of everyone in their small town.

After a 25-minute drive, Rhett pulled into the small paved lot behind the church, where he found a few other cars parked, including the new Accord Christy’s parents bought her the week before. Otherwise, the lot was empty, and Link was nowhere to be seen.

When ten minutes had passed, Link appeared, half walking, half jogging toward Rhett, visibly trying to settle himself. As he threw the door open and sat down in the car, he turned toward Rhett, all the color gone from his face. 

“Okay, let’s go.”

“Are you sure?” Rhett searched Link’s eyes, the gravity of Link’s decision rolling off of him and into the driver’s seat, nearly crushing Rhett there. Link’s eyes were set, but his hands were shaking.

“Rhett,” Link lifted his trembling left hand to the nape of Rhett’s neck and stroked it gently with his thumb. “I’m sure.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhett and Link hide out in a hotel, and Link catches Rhett up on what happened when he called off the wedding.

Link sat in the passenger seat of Rhett’s car in the parking lot of the Holiday Inn Angier, ducking his head for fear that some of his relatives may be staying there.

Rhett insisted on going in to book the room alone. He knew Link was afraid someone would see them together and make assumptions. Connect all the dots. It wouldn’t be fair. He and Link hadn’t put all the pieces together for themselves yet. 

Just an hour before, Rhett hadn’t been sure Link would really be able to walk away. Even if he were able to break the news to his fiancée, two sets of families were in town. Plans had been made. Money had been spent.

But Link was here.

Another silent car ride had passed between them, Link’s eyes far away as Rhett hummed along with the radio. But Link was here, taking a chance on Rhett.

Long strides and two big sneakers caught Link’s eye in his peripheral vision, and he turned to roll his window down as Rhett approached the car and rested his elbow on the newly empty space.

“Hey.”

“Hey.”

They regarded one another for a moment, neither certain how the other would handle the next few minutes. Link expected Rhett to tell him the room number and how long he should wait before following him in. Rhett prayed Link wouldn’t run.

After a few moments, Rhett opened the door to the back seat, passed one duffel bag over the front seat to Link, and grabbed the box of donuts and his own bag. Link hesitated, looking up at Rhett and moving his hand to the door. 

“You want to give me a key and then --”

“Roll up your window so we can go in, man.”

They chuckled at talking over one another, and Rhett dug in his pockets for the second key as Link rolled up his window. When Link’s hand hovered over the door handle, Rhett opened it from the outside.

Before Rhett turned to walk back toward the hotel, he was overwhelmed by Link’s presence. By the sad and hopeful and disoriented look in his eyes. By his blind faith in Rhett. 

Two long arms wrapped around Link’s shoulders, giving him one quick pat on the back before Rhett thought better of the embrace and dropped it. Without another word, he turned and led the two of them toward the hotel. They walked together in silence, neither of them mentioning going in separately. 

 

“I thought about just getting one,” Rhett admitted as he plopped himself down on one of two double beds in the room. “I just...couldn’t bring myself to it.”

“That’s okay.” 

Link took in the dingy carpet, the small television, the bolted-down bedside table and lamp, but his eyes soon focused on Rhett. He smiled softly, and the seated man returned the gesture.

“You gonna tell me what happened?”

Link shrugged and slinked toward Rhett, sitting next to him on the bed. As he did, Rhett took hold of Link’s hips and in one smooth motion dragged the smaller man over and across his lap, Link’s behind landing on Rhett’s other side as his legs stretched over Rhett’s thighs. Link found his shoulder pressed up into Rhett’s chest, one wide palm gripping his side as Rhett’s other arm rested across his thighs.

Link sighed and wrapped his arms around Rhett’s waist, holding him tighter, some of the burden of the day lifting away from him, as though it were unable to remain on his shoulders while their bodies were pressed together.

“So...?” Rhett murmured into Link’s ear after a few long minutes in this embrace. 

Link took a deep breath, and then he started from the beginning. 

When he arrived at Christy’s, he’d asked her to come outside with him, away from her family. When he told her he couldn’t get married, she’d assumed he was kidding. When he made it clear he wasn’t, asking her to sit with him on the porch, she’d run inside to her mother.

Twenty minutes later, Christy and her mom met Link outside, where her mother led the conversation, beginning by calmly telling Link that it was normal to be nervous, and ending by calling their pastor and Link’s mother, in that order.

“I could have just said I wouldn’t go up there and left…” Link’s brows furrowed as he looked up into Rhett’s face. 

“You did what you thought you had to. It’s okay.” Rhett squeezed him and kissed his forehead. “So that’s how you ended up at the church?”

“Yeah,” Link’s speech was muffled as he nuzzled his face back into Rhett’s chest. “I figured it made sense to just go with them, you know?”

Rhett hummed, reassuring and deep. It comforted Link, even as his voice shook.

“So at the church, they talked at me for a long time. Just kind of all yelled at me until the pastor made them stop. But it was worse from him. Bein’ all calm. Asking if I just needed to confess something to Christy before the wedding.”

A tear fell down Link’s cheek as he looked back up at Rhett. “I tried taking her aside. Asked her to talk to me without everyone around. Told her I didn’t necessarily want to break up. Because I don’t know what this…”

Rhett nodded knowingly. They’d known each other nearly as long as they could remember, but Link was right -- whatever this thing was between them, it was really new.

“I was so scared, and I didn’t know what to say, and I just wanted to get away, you know?”

“It’s prob’ly good we got you out of there, then.” Rhett’s hand curled around Link’s neck and played at his hair.

“Yeah, I guess so,” Link gave a half-hearted smile. “But Rhett, before I walked out, I told them. I had to. They were all staring at me, and the excuse that I wasn’t completely sure about getting married seemed so weak. It just came out.”

Rhett’s heart started to race -- Link could feel it where they were pressed together -- but he replied calmly. “Okay… What did you say?”

“I…” Link hid his face again, pulling Rhett tighter, as if he might run away at Link’s next words when they came pouring out. “I said there might be someone else. That I’ve had impure thoughts and that I’m a sinner and that I don’t deserve her.”

Link breathed heavily into the embrace, pressing his forehead harder into Rhett’s shoulder. Rhett’s heart settled; Link hadn’t used his name, and even if he had, there was no time to panic right now. Link was hurting, and it was Rhett’s fault. His arms held Link tight as he tried to comfort him. “Shh, that’s not true.”

“It is. She couldn’t even look at me, Rhett.” After a few minutes, Link was shaking in Rhett’s arms, and his watery eyes glanced back up. “She said she never wants to see me again.”

Another tear fell, disappearing this time under Rhett’s thumb, his fingers wrapping easily around Link’s face. “I’m sorry. It’ll be okay. We’ll figure something out. I’m so so sorry.”

For nearly an hour Link talked, explaining his actions that day and talking through his feelings. Rhett massaged his head, rubbed his upper arms, stroked his back. He nodded and hummed for Link to continue, and Link’s eyes began to dry as he thought aloud about the position he felt he put himself in.

“I don’t regret calling it off, Rhett. I don’t. I just…all day it still felt like I could be making a mistake.”

Rhett leaned his head back and tilted Link’s chin toward him. “I can still take you back up there. You say the word, and --”

“No, no, that’s not what I’m saying.” Link shook his head, leaning forward and closing his eyes, drawing Rhett into a short kiss, the first they’d shared since parting ways that morning.

Link sighed as he pulled away, and when he opened his eyes, Rhett was grinning, his own eyes dancing as they searched Link’s face.

Link cocked his head to the side. “What are you smiling at?” 

“You.”

A closed-mouthed smile took over Link’s features. “What’re you doin’ that for?”

Rhett chuckled and pressed another quick kiss to Link’s lips. “Because you’re here. Sittin’ in my lap. Actin’ like you think I’m gonna be mad about anything that happened today.”

“Well I’m here with you freaking out like a dang mess,” Link blurted, incredulous, marvelling at the broad smile on Rhett’s face. 

“I’m pretty sure I’m asleep,” Rhett continued, ignoring Link’s protests. “I’m in the guest bed at your momma’s house and you’re asleep in the next room. I just know it.”

Link adjusted himself on the bed and straddled Rhett’s lap with his knees. He leaned forward to kiss Rhett deeply, “And this is just a good dream?”

“Mhmm.” 

Link took hold of Rhett’s belt loops, dragging him down onto the bed, and flattened himself out over Rhett’s body. He kissed Rhett’s neck, starting at his clavicle and working a path up to his mouth again. “Can you tell I’m real yet?”

“Nope, I’m dreaming.” 

“Well wake up, brother, because I’m here,” Link pushed himself up, leveraging his weight with his palms flat against Rhett’s chest. “Do you see me yet?”

Rhett chuckled. “I don’t know… this is just what dream Link would do.”

Link’s eyebrows shot up. Straddling Rhett, kissing up his neck, pressing their bodies together -- he’d used most of his arsenal of seductive moves. Without _going further_ , anyway. “Dream Link?”

“Yeah, he kisses me too. Just usually doesn’t try to wake me up,” Rhett’s smile faded at the memory of years spent dreaming about his best friend, unwilling to believe any of those fantasies could become reality.

“Rhett,” Link lay out against Rhett’s chest once more, moving his hands to the sides of his face, one finger lightly brushing at the rim of his ear. “I’m here, bo.”

Rhett took a deep breath, his arms encircling Link and his fingers interlaced against the small of his back. “You may have to keep reminding me.”

Link grinned broadly, planting a gentle kiss on Rhett’s lips. “I can do that.”

 

“I’m really hungry,” Link announced as the sun began to set. He’d been queasy and, rightly, focused on other things for most of the day, and then he’d napped in Rhett’s arms for the last couple hours. “I haven’t had anything since this morning.”

Rhett rubbed a contemplative circle onto his own stomach and agreed. He hadn’t eaten much either, and now that they’d had a few hours to let their nerves settle down, hunger fought its way to the forefront of their minds. 

“Oh! We have a few more donuts,” Rhett said, hopping up to grab the box.

“Euck…” 

“But,” Rhett chuckled, turning back toward the room and dropping the donuts on the desk in the corner. “These are cold and gross and you won’t like them.” Link grinned and shook his head. “So let’s go get something.”

“Yes!” Link agreed. “I can’t do cold donuts, man. You want to just go pick up a pizza and bring it back here?”

They found a phone number for a nearby Pizza Hut in the bedside table and called in their order, then headed to the car together to go pick it up. When they arrived just ten minutes later, they were early, and the two men settled into a booth to wait. 

Link sat facing the door, his eyes darting between the door and the parking lot in front of the restaurant. Rhett sat across from him, focused on nothing in the world but the concern on Link’s face. 

A man and three children walked past their table to leave, and Link ducked his head, causing two of the children to erupt into laughter. 

“Calm down, Link.” Rhett placed his hand gingerly over Link’s on top of the table. “Your family was staying in Buies Creek, right?”

“Jackson!” The man behind the counter announced that the next call-in pizza order was ready. 

Link jumped again, and Rhett gripped his hand. “Dude, you’re not related to any Jacksons.”

“I should have stayed in the car. What was I thinking?”

Link’s hand was cold and clammy, but he turned it over now, palm up into Rhett’s, and urged himself to breathe deeply. Rhett was right. He wasn’t related to any Jacksons. Most of his family lived close enough that they would have turned around and gone home after learning that the wedding had been called off. 

“McLaughlin!”

Rhett grinned. “That’s what I’m talkin’ about.”

Link hunched and hid his face, following closely behind Rhett as they made their way to the counter to pay for the pizzas and leave. Behind him, the door swung open with the jingle of a little bell, and Link’s uncle, his father’s brother, stepped inside. He’d last seen Link five years before, the final summer Link had worked in the tobacco fields, but as Link turned around, he recognized his uncle instantly. 

The man looked confused as Link, who his uncle would have recognized anywhere -- the young man looked exactly like his father had at 20 -- smiled hesitantly and bolted for the parking lot. Rhett stood stunned, shrugging an apology at Link’s uncle as he slid past him to the door.

Rhett met Link at the passenger door and reached past him to unlock it, carefully brushing against him. “Okay, so some of your relatives are here.” Rhett offered a sympathetic furrowing of his eyebrows and squeezed Link’s arm, the one furthest from the building, hoping Link’s uncle was either not looking or unable to discern any meaning from the small gesture. “You okay?” 

Link’s lips quivered as he nodded and took the pizzas from Rhett. “Let’s just go. Please.”

Back in the room, they ate quietly, but for Rhett’s happy noises as he realized just how hungry he had been. The hot pepperoni pizza satisfied that empty ache just as he was beginning to really feel it. 

After his fourth slice, Rhett found Link staring at him, a second slice of plain cheese pizza half-eaten in his hand. 

“What?” Rhett mumbled through his latest mouthful. “I told you I was hungry, too.”

“I know you were, man.” Link chuckled as he took another bite. “I just forget how fast you eat sometimes.” The young men looked at one another for a while, smiling through closed mouths as they chewed, Rhett digging into the second half of his pizza. 

Returning the top of the box to cover his pizza, Link finally said what Rhett knew he’d been thinking about. “Uncle Robert saw me. He’s going to call my dad.”

“Yeah, I bet so.”

“Tomorrow’s not going to be fun.”

“I know, I’m sorry,” Rhett reached again for Link’s hand. “But we’ll figure something out, okay?”

For a moment they sat in silence as Link thought about the conversations that awaited both of them tomorrow. He wondered how much everyone would know or assume about him by morning.

“They’re going to know you’re with me if they didn’t already.” Link squeezed Rhett’s hand and eyed him sincerely. “You’re pretty easy to describe, even if he doesn’t remember your name.”

“What me?” Rhett said, a coy, crooked smile aimed at soothing Link’s apprehension. “Why am I easy to describe?”

“Because you’re a freaking giant!” 

Link hadn’t picked up on the neither serious nor modest tone of Rhett’s voice. Rhett tried again, leaning forward with a glint in his eyes and puffing out his chest as he pushed the pizzas to the side. “Am not. I’m no bigger than a hundred-seventy, maybe a hundred-eighty pounds.”

“Well,” Link blushed, catching on now. He sat up on his knees and smoothed his hands over Rhett’s shoulders. “You’re still a big man.” 

“You’re right. I am, huh?” Rhett grinned, plucking a quick kiss from Link’s lips before plopping himself at Link’s side against the bed’s headboard. He wrapped one arm behind Link around his waist, turning their bodies subtly toward one another. “It’s going to be okay, man. Even if your uncle calls your dad, they’re not going to be out looking for us or anything. Tomorrow we’ll handle tomorrow. Just breathe, okay?”

Link took a few deep breaths, and when he settled, he leaned onto Rhett’s shoulder. 

Rhett planted a kiss in Link’s hair and ordered himself not to say what he was thinking: he’d take Link back to Christy in the morning if that’s what he wanted. There was no need to say it. Link knew it, and the words could only hurt right now. They both knew they might never have the courage to tell everyone the truth. 

Rhett combined the pizzas into one box and put it away, then turned on the evening news, and the two men settled into the bed, leaning back against the pillows and one another. Neither of them heard a word about what else was going on in the world. Rhett held Link against his chest, mystified that his friend didn’t seem to be going anywhere, and Link lay in Rhett’s arms, weighing over and over the opposing outcomes of the choices he had to make.

When it was nearly midnight, Rhett shook Link’s arm. “Hey. You still awake?”

“I’m not always asleep when I’m not talking.” Link grinned, sitting up to look at Rhett. 

“I just wanted to check. See if you’re ready to go to sleep or what.” Rhett stood from the bed and riffled through his duffel in the corner of the room, turning his back to Link to change out of his clothes. He pulled on a pair of pajama bottoms, foregoing a shirt. “I can take the greasy bed if you want.”

Link pushed his back against the headboard and his worries from the forefront of his mind. Feigning a pout, he moved to the edge of the mattress. “You kicking me out of your bed?”

“Oh! No! I didn’t know if you’d want, I mean, we wouldn’t have to do anything.” Rhett’s neck and chest turned a splotchy pinkish-red. “I’d be happy just sitting here watching T.V. all night as long as you’re here.”

“Well, maybe I do want to. Do something.”

Rhett’s eyebrows cocked up in shock. He stood at the foot of the second bed, stock still at Link’s admission. “You want to _what?_ ” 

Link bit his lip, scanning first Rhett’s surprised face and then down his bare chest. “I don’t know yet. Just c’mere and kiss me.”

Rhett was happy to oblige. He stooped over where Link was seated, kissing him gently. Then, with his knees up on the mattress, he took hold of Link’s waist and dragged him up the bed, laying Link’s head down on a pillow at the far corner of the bed and perching himself on his elbows above Link.

Rhett held up most of his own weight on his knees and elbows, but Link pulled him down, long fingers interlacing behind Rhett’s head and urging him to bring their bodies closer. 

They were fast and slow, alternately deepening their kisses and abandoning mouths in favor of necks and ears and temples. Link’s hands roamed Rhett’s back and shoulders, the familiar territory brand new in the world they’d created only hours before. 

Link found his mouth at Rhett’s ear, panting into it, as Rhett ground his hips down for the first time. Link giggled nervously and pushed at Rhett’s shoulders. “Time out.”

Link sat up a few inches and Rhett sat back on his haunches, searching Link’s face with dark eyes. Link’s were fixed on Rhett’s waistband. “I haven’t, I’ve never --” For lack of an ability to further explain, Link gestured to Rhett’s crotch. 

“I haven’t either!”

“I thought you said you and Jessie…?”

Realization struck Rhett. Link didn’t just mean touching another man. “Oh gosh. You mean...” Rhett rubbed his palms on his thighs.

“Yeah.”

The two men’s heavy breathing settled only slightly as they stared at one another, trying to decide how to proceed, both still displaying the evidence of their shared arousal. 

“Well you’ve,” Rhett’s voice dropped low and quiet at the taboo word, “ _masturbated_ , right?”

Link’s face went a brighter shade of red and he bit his lip, his gaze falling up to the ceiling. “Well, yeah.” No one had ever asked him about it so directly. It felt like an open secret. Something everyone assumed everyone else was doing but could never talk about.

“Tell you what,” Rhett reached for the hem of Link’s shirt and pulled, slipping it over his head and catching Link’s eye again. “Stop me if you want to.”

With that, Rhett urged Link’s body to fall flat against the bed once more and traced his hands down Link’s arms and back up his sides. Then, starting with his lips, then his neck, shoulders, and chest, Rhett worked kisses all over his body. He drove his hips down onto Link as he moved to each new, unexplored area of his body until he had to move down the bed to get his mouth closer to its intended destination. Link squirmed and moaned, gripping the sheets under them and throwing back his head. 

As he moved closer, Rhett pressed kisses above the waistband of Link’s jeans, his fingers curling under the denim. He watched Link’s face closely. Link had put up no resistance so far, had even urged Rhett on, and now as his hips shifted underneath Rhett, both men groaned, and Rhett tested his palm on top of Link’s jeans with one hand. Finally, with his fingers on the button of Link’s jeans, Rhett asked if he should continue. 

“Oh gosh,” Link breathed, his hips bucking forward as a hand travelled up his inner thigh. “I...I don’t know.”

“That’s okay.” Rhett kissed again at Link’s belly button, slowly trailing back down to the line of material that had become a roadblock. 

“Maybe you should let me…” Link reached out, and as his fingers landed on Rhett’s head, Rhett licked at the skin above his jeans. “Oh God, Rhett, stop, or I’ll --” Link flew from the bed, rolling out from under Rhett, and made a beeline for the bathroom. 

Moments later, Rhett heard Link’s palm slam against the bathroom wall and a loud groan emanate from behind it. When another minute passed, Link poked his head around the corner. “I’m, uh, I’m going to shower, okay? Be right back.”

Rhett chuckled to himself and lay on his back for a few minutes, drawing in deep breaths, his hands flat against his chest as he urged his body into a calm. _I did that to Link. He really wanted me for a second there._ He grinned to himself. _I can make it through tomorrow._ They were going to get through this together.

When the shower shut off again, Rhett moved into the cool covers of the unmarred bed and waited for Link to join him, to sleep for a second night in his bed.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After their night in the hotel, Rhett and Link have to face the world again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I *swear* I'm starting the next chapter right now and it won't be a million years before it's posted. Double pinky promise. If you're actually reading this, thank you so so much.

“Good morning, sleepyhead.”  


Link’s voice stirred Rhett from his sleep, and for a moment he fought to shake off the disorienting unfamiliarity of the room. In milliseconds his brain ran through the options: This wasn’t his apartment. Or Link’s house. Or his parents’. Then it hit him. Where he was and why he was there settled in, and a grin broke across his face. He rubbed his eyes until they blinked open, turning toward the sound of Link’s voice and finding him sitting on the edge of the other bed, dressed and pulling on tennis shoes.

“I let you sleep a long time, but it’s 10:30.”

Rhett stretched wide on the bed and patted the ruffled, empty, space next to him. “10:30 is still early. Come get back in the bed.”

Link’s lopsided smile suggested he was considering the offer, and he lingered as he shook his head. Then, choosing to fight off temptation, he stood and moved toward the window to let more light into the room. 

It was a bright, warm day outside, despite Rhett’s prayers for rain. With good weather, they’d have to go outside and face the day. He squinted and frowned at the offending window as Link opened the blinds further. As the sun streamed over Link and onto Rhett, flooding the room, he groaned his displeasure and pulled a pillow over his face. 

“Rhett,” Link said softly, holding up one edge of the pillow. “You need to shower. And we need to go.” When Rhett sat up, tossing his long legs over the edge of the bed, Link offered a hand to pull him out of bed. 

Rhett took the extended hand, tried halfheartedly to use it to drag Link back into the bed with him, and, failing at that, used it to propel himself up and into Link’s space. With his free hand, he drew Link’s waist in, knocking him off balance and forcing him to take a few steps back as their lips met. Link’s hand instinctively moved to push Rhett away, landing on his chest, but it pulled him forward after a moment, sliding around to his neck. Link crinkled his nose as Rhett deepened the kiss.

“Rhett, I need to tell you something,” Link said, breaking his mouth away after a few seconds. He leaned in close and whispered in Rhett’s ear, sending a shiver down his long spine. “Your breath stinks. Real bad.”

An unconcerned chuckle ripped through Rhett’s chest, and he huffed out pizza-laced morning breath, one hand tipping Link’s chin up to meet his lips again. “Kiss me while my breath stinks so I know you lo--,” Rhett paused, his smile fading. “So I know you care,” he finished, swallowing hard as he gave Link one last squeeze and released his grip. 

The air felt thicker, too warm, as they stared one another down, eyes searching. Link pressed his lips together and Rhett turned away, reaching to grab his bag. 

“I do. Care,” Link took hold of Rhett’s shoulders, turning them toward him again. His eyes held something else, but too quickly he broke them away, looking toward his own duffel bag at the foot of the bed before glancing up at Rhett once more. His palms landed flat on Rhett’s chest. “But I need to go get my truck. And talk to my mom. And you... need to do some of that, too.”

 

At Christy’s house, Rhett watched Link get into his truck, grateful that they both got away without any confrontation, and followed Link south until they crossed the city limits into Buies Creek. Then he broke away with a quick honk to head back to his parents’ house. He and Link had agreed to settle things with their families individually, deciding their united front would do them more good symbolically than literally, particularly where their parents were concerned. 

As they left the hotel, they’d made a plan to meet up that evening. Rather than pay for another night, Rhett suggested they take Gregg up on his offer to let them stay at his apartment in Raleigh. As they left their sanctuary behind, Rhett caught Link in his arms one last time. “Will you come? Tonight?” Link promised he would, sealing the agreement with a kiss.

As he crossed the highway and pulled into his old neighborhood, Rhett’s car rolled to a stop. There, parked in the street, was a tiny car. It belonged to a tiny woman, the person he was most dreading seeing today. Of course she was waiting inside for him -- she hadn’t been able to get ahold of him the night before, despite his promise to call. He’d broken his promise in order to be with Link. 

_Thank goodness he doesn’t wear cologne._ Rhett’s heart beat faster and his stomach sank at the thought, the guilt pooling at the bottom of his lungs. _Cheater._ Was that even the right word, given how far back his feelings for Link went? They were there before he knew Jessie existed. Before he knew who he was on his own. Before he had any opportunity to run from them.

He took a deep breath, despite his lungs’ refusal to fully expand, and put his car in park behind Jessie’s. Rhett knew what to expect. She’d be inside, having been told that she could of course wait there for him. She’d be sitting with his mom, talking in a quick whisper as they each told the other everything they’d heard about Link calling off his wedding. Their voices would pitch up, their accents thicken at the suggestion of rumor. 

They wouldn’t know that Rhett had caused the day’s scandal. Not yet. 

He stepped from the car and turned his back on it before he could change his mind. He didn’t know how, but he had to talk to Jessie. 

 

Rhett entered the house through the open garage and found Jessie and his mother, Diane, sitting at a small breakfast table before a large bay window. Both women turned, their faces filled with surprise and relief as Rhett offered a weak “Hey y’all.”

“Rhett!” Jessie jumped from her spot at the table, excitement and concern in her heavily-accented voice. “I thought you were going to call. Is everything okay? Where’s Link?” 

The young woman’s inquisitive eyes bored into him, and Rhett found himself unable to speak or to look away. He hesitated a second too long before he continued. “Sorry. He’s, uh, going to his mom’s house.”

“So you _were_ with Link?” Jim McLaughlin stepped around the wall and into the kitchen, taking a seat at the table next to Diane and offering his son the remaining chair. “Sit down. Where have y’all been? Sue and Jessie called here all night looking for you.”

Rhett and Jessie settled into their seats at the table, everyone in the room at near eye level now. Within seconds, all eyes were on Rhett. Jessie took his hand as Mr. McLaughlin gestured for him to speak. “Rhett?”

Rhett told the story, keeping his version of the previous morning as close to the one he’d told Gregg and Tim as possible. He hoped Link would tell his family, when they asked, the same story of their evening. Rhett kept it as close to the reality as possible -- he knew Link would need some space from everyone, so they drove over to Angier to rent a hotel for the evening. “I was just, I don’t know, trying to be a good friend? He couldn’t go back over there last night.”

Mr. McLaughlin frowned as he studied Rhett’s face. “We heard Link told Christy there was someone else. Do you know anything about that?”

“No!” Rhett said too quickly, his reaction confirming the news. He shook his head. “I mean, yeah. Sorry. I just don’t know how much he would want me to say, you know?”

“But you were with him last night?” Mrs. McLaughlin finally chimed in. “Baby, you know being a good friend to him doesn’t mean lying if he went to see some other girl.”

“Rhett, how long have you known about this?” Jessie added, her voice hushed with her distress at the thought.

“He didn’t go see some girl last night,” Rhett looked sincerely into Jessie’s and then into his parents’ eyes. “I promise. It was just us. We got some pizza and talked. He needed to work through some stuff, you know? All they were doing over there when he called it off was yell at him.”

“Well I wonder why!” Mr. McLaughlin guffawed. “Everyone in his family in town for a wedding and the groom calls it off in the morning! About all he could have done worse was run outta there as they played ‘here comes the bride.’”

Rhett slammed his fist on the table. “You don’t understand.”

“Honey, stop that,” Diane rested her hand on Jim’s arm and cast him a steely glare before she turned back to Rhett. “Link’s a good boy. I think he’s just nervous. You think they’ll go down to the courthouse? Or reschedule?” 

Rhett took a deep breath. “Momma, I don’t know. He seems pretty sure he’s not ready for that.” Before anyone could ask him another uncomfortable question, Rhett tugged on Jessie’s hand and pushed himself away from the table. “I need to apologize properly for disappearing yesterday. Y’all excuse us, please.”

Jim moved to object, but Diane patted his arm again. “Okay, kids, have fun. Jessie, you come back for dinner later if you’re still in town!”

Out in the driveway, Rhett exhaled, long and shaky, and dropped Jessie’s hand, only to have her wrap her arms around his waist. “Hey. It’s okay. You wanna go for a walk?”

Rhett shook his head as he leaned into her hair. “Let’s go for a drive, okay?” 

“Okay.” She whispered as she gazed up at him, and he placed a light kiss on her forehead. “So long as you’re gonna tell me what really happened last night with Link.”

“I told you in there --”

Jessie shook her head, apprehension mixing with mischief in her eyes as she said simply, “That story was for your parents.”

 

“I didn’t mean to hurt you, I swear.”

In the parking lot of the abandoned-for-the-weekend middle school, Rhett buried his face in his hands against the steering wheel of his car. As he finished telling Jessie the real story of the last two days, she looked amazed and angry, but not shocked. 

“I asked you and you lied! Do you remember? Don’t tell me you don’t, Rhett McLaughlin!” 

For nearly a year, Rhett had tried to force the memory out of his mind. Since then, he’d attempted to rationalize her questions as a joke, but that day, Jessie’s big brown eyes had been sincere and kind. She met up with him in person to accept his invitation to their first real date, but her acquiescence came with one condition -- she wanted to know what was up with Link. Did Rhett have feelings for him? Did they ever date or kiss or talk about their feelings at all?

And she was right -- he’d lied. He had recited to her everything he’d been telling himself for years: _We’re just friends. We’re basically brothers. I mean, we’ve known each other since we were six years old._

Jessie’s eyes were wild as she stared him down from the passenger seat. She had all but seen this coming, but Rhett had soothed her concerns and betrayed her trust. “Look at me, Rhett. Tell me everything you lied about before.”

“We never… Nothing ever happened before. That was true,” Rhett tried, looking up at Jessie, her image disappearing into swimming, blurry colors in his brimming eyes. “It’s always just been me”, he sniffled. “Wishing I could tell him and knowing I never could, I guess.”

“You could have told me!” Jessie exclaimed. “I told you I wouldn’t say anything! I could have been your friend.” Tears began to roll down her cheeks, her anger morphing and fading as realization set in. She was losing the man she loved. He had lied and misled her, and things would never be the same. “How dare you make me love you?”

His guard broken down, Rhett answered her honestly. “I never thought anything with him would -- Oh God,” he whispered, the cruelty of completing the statement preventing him from speaking further. He wiped at his eyes and turned to face the girl who was no longer his. “I’m so sorry. I really hope you can forgive me.”

As they sat in silence, the brilliant, blinding sun was once again unwelcome. Rhett turned his face down and away from it. Once again, the soft, warm caress of late-Spring sunshine felt out of place. The world should have been freezing, giving him an opportunity to hide away from it.

Softly, Jessie broke the silence, reaching into the driver’s seat to take one of Rhett’s hands in both of her own. “It hasn’t been only you if he called off his wedding, you know,” came her voice, smaller than it had been before. “He’d be crazy not to love you.”

“Really?” Rhett smiled slowly.

“Really.” She gave his hand a final squeeze and buckled her seatbelt, dabbing at her eyes and straightening up in her seat. “Now. Take me to go get my car, you freaking jerk.”

 

Outside the home where she’d raised her two sons, Diane McLaughlin was picking weeds. She had tossed together a salad and set out bread and lunch meat for sandwiches before stepping out into the yard. She expected, without a shred of doubt in her mind, that her youngest son would bring his girlfriend inside for a late lunch when he returned home. 

Instead, he pulled up to the curb, bypassing the driveway, and waited as Jessie got into her car. They both drove away without explanation. Neither of them waved at Diane.

Rhett was halfway to Raleigh before he allowed himself to think about what was surely happening back home. His father would be furious that he hadn’t at least hugged his mother before driving the hour back to town. They’d be curious about what had caused him to leave in such a rush. But most importantly, they’d want to know why the change in Link’s relationship status had so profoundly affected Rhett’s behavior. 

_It’s only a matter of time before they find out._

Rhett shook his head and let the thought pass just as it had come. This was what he had wanted, more than anything, and he had to ready himself for the consequences of getting what he hoped for. Rhett had decided years ago that he would give up anything for Link. 

_Anything._

 

“Dude, you said he’s dealing with his family, right? Sit down and freaking eat something, at least. You’re makin’ me nervous.”

Long legs took a few more strides away, then turned around at the wall and brought Rhett back to the kitchen for what may have been the thousandth time that evening. 

“He hasn’t called. Should I drive over and check my place? I’m sure my roommates would let him in. He said he would meet me here, though...”

“ _Dude_ ,” Gregg drawled. “I swear if you don’t stop, you’re gonna make us both crazy.”

“Fine.”

Rhett plopped himself down at Gregg’s kitchen table and grabbed a paper plate, building a hot dog and covering it with chili. When he noticed that the chair he had chosen faced away from the door, he stood again, slid the plate across the table, and took a seat on the other side. As he took a bite, he felt Gregg’s eyes on him, and he looked up again.

“What are you lookin’ at me like that for? I sat down,” he mumbled through the mouthful. 

“It’s just,” Gregg cocked his head to the side as he searched for the words to say. Propping his feet up on the wide, smooth wood base of the table, he pushed his chair back onto two legs. “I’ve seen you be protective of him. I had no idea, though.” 

Rhett’s eyes dropped to his food again as his face turned red and his cheeks gave away his embarrassment at discussing the topic. “I’m just worried about him, man.”

Gregg took a look at the door. Link didn’t appear. “I’m sure he’ll show. No way he’s staying at his momma’s after he tells her, right?”

“That’s what I’m worried about.” Rhett didn’t elaborate on his fears, just focused his eyes on his plate, finishing the hotdog in a few big bites. Gregg had heard the stories about how quickly proud parents had turned on their sons. He didn’t need Rhett’s help dreaming up nightmare scenarios about what Link might be enduring from his mother. 

After talking to his mom, it was possible Link wouldn’t stay to talk. Not because he was choosing to get back to Rhett, but because he was no longer welcome in his mother’s home. The thought of Link being neither there nor here at Gregg’s with him was what truly terrified Rhett.

“How long have y’all been…” Earlier in the afternoon, Rhett could see his friend suppressing the urge to ask the question. But he’d been gentle, allowing Rhett to come in and sit, asking only, “Link comin’?”

Now, as Rhett stared at the ring of orange stains the chili dog left on the paper plate, the question registered half a second too late. “Huh? Oh, uh, 36 hours, I guess?” 

Gregg, seemingly taken aback that the answer hadn’t come as a number of weeks, months, or years, did the quick math. “Yesterday morning?”

“It’s never been anything else, dude. I don’t know what you want me to tell you.” Rhett glanced toward the door and, seeing no sign of it opening, hung his head again. “And anyway, he’s still in love with her.”

Gregg released a low whistle, dropping his chair back onto all four legs and leaning toward Rhett. “So, wait, I thought you two were, like, something. Isn’t that why you’re here?”

“We’re something, I guess,” Rhett shook his head. “All he could say for sure is that he couldn’t get married knowing. About me. That me and him… you know.” 

For a moment, silence hung in the air, Gregg’s bemused expression landing on an unseeing Rhett. “I really don’t, man. I don’t know. But I hope everything’s okay with him. I’m sure he’ll turn up soon.”

With that, Gregg left the table, and for a few hours, Rhett sat alone while his former roommate watched syndicated episodes of some TV show or another. Minutes creeped by, but no one came to the door. Before he knew it, Gregg had cleared the paper plates, food, and used napkins from the table and turned out the light in the kitchen. Rhett, suddenly cast into darkness, looked up at him. “What’re you doing?”

“I’m gonna go to bed. It’s midnight, and _some_ of us have to work tomorrow. You waiting up on the couch?”

Rhett nodded his assent -- if he sat with his back against its arm, the couch had a great view of the door -- and stood, his long limbs creaking from disuse. With a wide stretch and yawn, he confirmed his decision. “Yeah, I think I’ll wait a little longer.”

“If you get ready to sleep, I’ve got that second room. Don’t sleep on the couch, dude.”

At 12:30, Rhett began pacing again, keeping himself awake with the movement and praying time would move more quickly if he were active. At 1:00, something disastrous happened to Link, Rhett just knew it. His truck was wrapped around a tree, maybe, or one of Christy’s relatives followed through on teaching the kid they always knew was “a little funny” a lesson. At 1:30, Rhett swore he heard the phone ring, and he rushed to answer it, returning to pacing the floor when no one was on the line. 

At 1:45, Link didn’t love Rhett, didn’t care for him at all. That morning, if Rhett had been paying attention, he would have noticed. Link _wanted_ to leave the hotel. He was repulsed by Rhett’s touch. He insisted they get dressed and leave. He insisted they spend the day apart.

At 2:00, Rhett sat down on the couch, and by 2:15, he was nodding off, jerking awake every few minutes, certain sleep had made him miss a call. 

At 3:00, Link wasn’t coming. Rhett checked the front door and left it unlocked, removed his clothes, pulled on his cotton pajama pants, and slid under the cool cotton sheets. Pressing his face into one pillow and dragging the other into his chest, he begged his mind not to dream.

**Author's Note:**

> I'd love any feedback! Your comments and kudos would be very much appreciated! <3
> 
> And come find me on Tumblr as [clemwasjustagirl](http://clemwasjustagirl.tumblr.com/) if you're into that kind of thing.


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